Fulfillment whispers that once we obtain something we’ll be happy. We tell ourselves once we have this or once we have that we’ll finally be happy. Things like a better body, more money in our bank account, or more stylish clothes or a car haunt us–screaming that without them we’ll never find the happiness we seek. But it’s not a lack of these things that makes us miserable. It’s our lack of understanding that fulfillment only offers a temporary fix to an internal problem.
The list of what we tell ourselves will make us happy usually goes on and on, but with a new year upon us it’s important to know that a lot of resolutions will actually just be fulfillment in disguise. Because though there is nothing wrong with desire or obtaining goals, we create problems for ourselves when we assign our self-worth to external circumstance. What we do or do not do does not define our worthiness, but when we hand over our power to things like goals or people we only set ourselves up for failure. Our power is ours to hold onto and without it we put our happiness in the hands of something that doesn’t have the ability to make us happy in the first place.
So hold onto your power. Instead of telling yourself that something will make you happy it’s time to stop assigning it power over you. Create obtainable, worthwhile goals that you will find pleasure in going after, but won’t disappoint you if they don’t come to light right away. Half the fun of passion is working towards what it is you seek.
When we change our minds, we come to find that we actually change our lives. Because happiness is an inside job. Things in our lives have the ability to contribute to our happiness, yes, but they cannot lastingly create it. We must create our own light when it’s dark–our own happiness when it might be hard to find.
So in 2018 it might be a new year, but it’ll only be a new you if you stick to what you want it to be. It takes perseverance, self-compassion, and patience when things don’t change all at once. You have to have a belief in yourself that’s never existed before. Without it you’ll never accomplish the real goals that will make your year everything you’re dreaming it can be.
Be dedicated to all you can be without assigning your worth to objects with the ability to be taken away. Which is why for me personally in the upcoming year I’m going to be the same me–devoted to being the best version of me without telling myself I’ll only be happy if.
If you liked this article, please check out my first book The Dark Dictionary available on amazon. And please feel free to follow me on social media for more! @andrewwrichard.