Can someone get me a new rule book?
WHO made up millennium dating rules and how do I get a copy so I can alter my expectations and govern myself accordingly? One rule is to stop expecting a phone call sis, when a text is just as good. Secondly, Netflix and chill IS a planned date. Going dutch is the norm, so stay ready. Times are hard so the girl code about dating a guy who’s also dated your friend, is revised. How close of friends are you? How long did they date? Did they have sex? If she’s a mutual friend, they dated less than six months, and they had sex less than ten times-go for it.
WHAT do you do when you like a guy and he likes you but neither one of you can commit. Not because you’ve never been in a relationship before. But simply because it’s not the right timing or you’re “emotionally unavailable”. What does that exactly mean anyway? We’re available enough to call, text, hang out, and care about each other’s wins and losses. But it’s just less risky to be friends with benefits than to put that boyfriend/girlfriend title on it. Let’s just “go with the flow” and see what happens. When did we learn to fear the label?
WHEN it is it time to give up the panties? When you reach a certain age, let’s say over 30, do the rules still apply? Do we still have to wait 90 days like Steve Harvey told us? If we have sex on the first date does this mean we will never end up in a relationship? If I have more than one sexual partner in a 30 day period, does that mean I’m a ho? Do people still ask “what is your number”?
WHERE can I find a good man? These are the options I’ve been told: Church. Something about having an ulterior motive at church doesn’t sit well with me. I’m going to hear the word and fill my spirit but I’m also looking to see how many cuties are up in here. The barbershop. Borrow someone’s son, nephew, or little cousin that needs a haircut and take it from there. Go to Home Depot. Walk up and down the isles looking for something for your house, even though you’re renting. Attend a sporting event. Go to a game or sports bar and try not to be ignored by guys who are intently watching the game with their boys or their girlfriend.
HOW come you’re in a relationship but you want to “stay friends”? Friends with benefits, basically. If I can’t call or text you on your real phone, using your real phone number and not an app or social media site, then we can’t be friends. If your wife cannot meet me and if we hang out we need to be in a different city, we can’t be friends. If we link up “for the last time” and you try to kiss me, we can’t be friends. If you’re sending me dick pics and you want me to reciprocate, we definitely can’t be friends.
WHY do we try to get into relationships with guys who clearly state that they don’t want a relationship. Either they are already in one or they have no desire to be tied down to one person. Yet, we continue to fill the role as a girlfriend when they clearly don’t want to be our boyfriend. We just keep auditioning for that role, putting in that work, sexing him good, and cooking those meals-hoping one day we’ll get the part.
WHAT’s up with you not posting any pics of us, me, or anything related to you being in a relationship? It’s 2017 and if you’re not professing your love for me on social media, we’re not really together. It doesn’t matter that I’ve met your friends and family, we live together, and are talking about getting married. If you don’t claim me on the ‘gram it’s not really real.