The Good

Love is a Drug

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Love is the most powerful word in the world. It can make powerful men weak and successful women lose their common sense temporarily or forever. If only Love could be bottled and sold to everyone, versus scraping up whatever you can in life. If love came in a bottle form, ready for the consumer, it would have to have a warning label and that could be quite lengthy. The label would have to say, warning, this pill may cause confusion, blurred vision, hard of hearing, insanity, stupidity, loss of income and delusional thinking. When you think about it, love does all those things to you, so why would you even want to take the pill? Can you imagine for a moment, if it was in bottle form. Would you take it? Every day you could just pop the “Love Pill” along with your Vitamin C and Magnesium before heading out the door for the day. The euphoria that would sweep over you leaving your body tingling and warm. Would it become your morning ritual? Would your partner remind you to take it? Maybe they would leave it right next to your glass of OJ on the kitchen table. On days your partner really pisses you off, would you throw the pills down the toilet or hide them? That’s it, I’ll teach ’em! I don’t want any of that stupid Love today and they aren’t getting any of it either! I want to feel anger and sadness instead. Won’t that be fun? All that fighting, bickering and lack of sex from not having the Love Pill. Who would do that? Because that is what happens when there is no Love in your life. You feel empty and like something is missing from within. Why would you lurk around all day with a dark cloud hanging over you when you could feel the bubbly effervescent effects that love makes you feel inside? This is probably why I love drinking champagne so much. But, then again, I have done some really outrageous things when I have been hopped up on the bubbly stuff. Like, stripped down to my bra and underwear and made a snow angel outside when it was 20 below. No worries, I did not feel the effects of the cold. I did feel the effects of a headache though the next day and a mild snow burns on my backside. All worth it! Just like Love.
The flip side of not taking the Love Pill would be if you took too much. Oh boy, I know what that feels like. Like when you first meet someone and everything looks, smells and sounds like them. Your head starts spinning and it feels like you have taken something when you fall in love. You feel like you are on drugs and you are, it’s called Love. So, make it in pill form and it would be controllable. God help you if you ever OD’d on the Love pill. If you took too much, the effects would be disastrous. Wandering around for days in a haze, no recollection of what you did, how much you spent or where the hell you have been. Kind of like what love does to you anyway. How much would this pill cost? It already costs too much! Separation, divorce, houses, finances, boats, cottages and your pension. Oops! That’s the after effects of love. My mistake! The pharmaceutical companies would be elated. They could offer a generic brand of the Love Pill or the REAL DEAL. Only those who could afford the Love Pill would be able to get the good stuff. The rest of the world would have to settle for the ORDINARY Love Pill. Who wants that? Ordinary Love. Then a street drug version of the Love Pill would surface and that, of course, has the guise of feelings of seduction and sexual lust. Yup, that stuff will send you right into bed with the wrong person every time. But, it will feel sooooo good. Till the next morning, when it wears off and you don’t know where the hell your car keys are or your underwear. The knock-off Love Pill available on the streets would only make you feel similar effects of love, but not the real deal. Totally uncontrollable. What chaos the world would be. All these people hopped up on Love and Lust. Oh wait, it already is. – Orlena Cain

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